Keep your room well-lit.
And don't sit too close to the television.
[Today they are working in a convenience store. The most popular item in the store is the "Tasty Stick".]
[Gin-san, who has a sweet-tooth, always picks chocolate flavor. Don't forget "Bargain Dash Ice Cream" too!]
Welcome!
Never mind the welcome.
Note: "Nmaibo" literally means tasty stick.
If you're working, how come you're eating Nmaibo?
Because it's nmai.
Are you trying to make a fool outta me?
Hey! You're spilling crumbs into my bag!
Hey! Where's the store manager?! Manger?!
I'm the manager, Sakata. Sir, got a problem?
You two are the problem!
Hey, he seems awfully upset. What'd you do?
I don't know. He's been in a bad mood since he walked in, manager!
Hey! I'm telling you to stop munching on that! Hey!
Sorry, sir.
We're temporary help, so we're not too familiar with sophisticated marketing issues.
But we're doing our best, so give us a break.
I don't care if you do your best. I'm just telling to take that stick out of your mouth!
Hey! What're you microwaving over there?!
I don't know. But I'm working really hard at it, yup!
Yup?! Hey, my JUMP's in there!
Huh?! It exploded! What exploded?!
What're you doing, you?! My JUMP is covered with salad dressing!
I don't know about that.
But I think it's a good thing to have a cozy convenience store like this in such a cold-hearted era.
It's not! Gimme back my money!
That's why I said it was impossible for us.
Say, I'm looking after a convenience store as a favor to my friend.
But I have some business I gotta take care of and can't watch over the store.
Sorry, it's only for one day. Thanks so much.
See you!
At this rate, by the time Hasegawa-san returns, the shop will be out of business.
What're you doing?
Open your shirts. You stole something, didn't you?
What?! I didn't...!
Sh-Shin-chan?
Takachin?
["Don't Be Shy - Just Raise Your Hand and Say It"]
Hachibei Takaya, age sixteen. The same as you, Shinpachi.
Aren't you embarrassed? Stealing at your age!
You'll make your mama cry.
Besides, what were you planning to do with so much hair styling gel?
Quit worrying about your hair and be more confident about yourself!
Like I was gonna use all of this myself!
Then what? A condiment?
Were you planning to pour it over your rice so you could eat silky, luxuriant food?
Takachin, why'd you do such a thing?
Takachin, you didn't used to be like this.
Shut up! How many years do you think have passed?
I'm not the Takachin you used to know.
So just take me wherever...to the police station or the magistrate.
And if they wanna crucify me, fine!
Don't expect me to be grateful.
I'll just come back again.
And I'll stop you again.
Sheesh, still the same goody-two-shoes, eh? Shin-chan.
Leave Takachin alone!
When we were at Temple school together, you and your sister always came to my rescue.
Shin-chan!
We'll make you cry too!
Go ahead and cry!
I will not! I'm a samurai's son!
What's the big idea, you bullies!
Well, it was mostly your sister creating a scene.
Brings back memories.
I thought you'd be my friend, no matter what happened.
Until that day that you betrayed me.
Takachin, that was...
I don't wanna hear your excuses!
Do you know how much I suffered because of your half-assed attempt at kindness?!
Ever since that day, I...
Well, forget it.
Thanks to you, I got a little stronger.
I'm in a gang now.
Heard of them? The Bulldogs?
I don't need to rely on your strength anymore. I'm strong now!
Takachinko? Who's that?
[Note: Chinko means penis.]
Not Takachinko. Takachin.
You really don't remember?
I've forgotten about the past.
I've decided to be more forward-thinking.
But never mind that. I brought you all a treat.
Gin-san, Kagura-san, please help yourselves.
Yay! Big sis!
I tried making something new.
Here you go. Rolled omelets.
I'll go and get some drinks!.
Never mind. I'll go, you sit!
This is a convenience store. You can find all the drinks you need right here.
You mustn't embarrass a girl like that.
Shin-chan, come here and eat. It's very good.
Shin-chan...?
Sister...
Without a doubt, the Bulldogs are the rowdiest gang around.
They fight and steal without a care.
[Note: Chinpo also means penis.]
Shin-chan, why are you so concerned about Takachinpo.
It's Takachin, Sister.
It's my fault that Takachin turned that way. I turned my back on him.
When he was at his lowest point...
Sh-Shin-chan, what'll I do? I pooped my pants.
What'll I do, Shin-chan?
Shin-chan, I'll bet you're really awake.
Shin-chan, Shin-chan!
The springtime of youth is like a sandcastle. The smallest thing can make it crumble.
Right after that, I stopped going to the Temple school due to family debts.
But it's not hard to imagine Takachin's life after that.
What should I have done back then?
How could I have answered Takachin's call?
No, no. That was a hopeless case.
Yes, totally hopeless.
No, it wasn't.
When your friend is crying, cry with him.
When your friend is worried, you should worry with him.
When your friend has an awkward bowel movement...
then you must have a bowel movement too, Shin-chan.
If you are a friend, you should be able to share the other's pain, no matter what.
And Shin-chan, if your friend goes down the wrong path...
Then, you must stop your friend, even if it ruins your friendship.
That is true samurai friendship.
Excuse me, manager. I have some business to take care of. Please excuse me.
Hey, hey, are you sure about this?
You never know what the youth will do these days.
Don't come crying to me if something happens.
[Bulldog]
You useless idiot! Who said to get regular-hold mousse?!
I told you, didn't I?
I need extra control styling mousse to hold my hair in place!
I-I'm sorry. I ran into a little trouble.
You begged me to let you to join the gang, so I made an exception!
But if you can't even do a simple errand, what's the use?
I think I need to beat some of that fighting spirit into you, right? Some spirit.
Wh-What's this?!
Hey, what're you doing?!
Hachibei, we'll give you some fighting spirit!
Wh-Wha--?!
Who the hell are you?!
Who am I? You must be some amateur if you don't know who I am.
I am the President of the Otsu-chan Fan Club, Shinpachi Shimura!
Sh-Shin-chan...
What're you doing here?! This is no place for you!
Go home!
Excuse me!
Who's your leader?
Huh? As if our Chairman would see a guy like you!
So, kid? Whaddya want?
I'm here to take Hachibei Takaya back.
From this moment on, he is resigning from the Bulldogs and joining the Otsu-chan Fan Club!
I came to get your permission.
Wh-What're you saying?! Otsu-chan Fan Club? What the hell is that? I...
Takachin. I'm just like you.
Since that crap incident, I've been sick of my weakness, and I've wanted to become stronger.
But Takachin, there's no shortcut to becoming strong.
Even if you try to look strong, appearances eventually wear off.
Joining a gang and hiding behind the ferocity of some other guy's strength...
Is that the kind of strength you want?
Do you really want to be like these uncool guys?
Kid! Sorry, but this gang ain't no social club.
This ain't the kind of organization where you can just say "I quit." And we just say "Oh, okay then."
In that case, I'll take him by force.
Hey, don't underestimate us, brat!
And what makes you think you can do anything alone!
He's not alone!
Hey Chief, part-time work is a pain in the ass! I couldn't stand it.
If it's a fight you want, then we'll join in!
The Otsu-chan Fan Club Special Attack Squad "Maltese" has arrived!
Pleased to make your acquaintance.
[Maltese(?) Please verify.]
Hey... My hairline looks unnatural today.
Geez, what if it falls off while I'm galloping along?
My carefully built reputation will be in ruins, that's for sure.
Oh well, I overdid it when I was younger... All the hair dyes and permaments.
I guess I'll just have to glue it on today.
Chairma-a-a-an!
Y-You idiot!! At least knock first, okay?
S-Sorry!
Huh? Where should I have knocked?
Knock in your heart! What do you want?
We've got trouble!! A bunch of guys came to fight and they're crazy strong!
Slaaaash!
What're you jerks doing?!
Chairman!
I keep telling you, don't settle everything with violence!
What's going on? What happened?
Chairman... I think something happened to your head.
Just the four of you taking on the Bulldogs? Edo's strongest and fastest gang?
Who are you guys?
Huh? We're the...you know. Special Force...um...what was it?
Huh? Special Force Pomeranian... Wasn't that it?
Yeah, something like that. Let's use that.
It's Maltese. At least remember our gang name.
Oh yeah! We're the Malcheese!
A circle with a triangular piece of cheese.
Don't mess with us!
Huh? "Don't mess with Maltese"? I don't get it...
Never heard of you. What do you want anyway?!
We're taking Takachin with us! I won't let you force my friend to shoplift!
Takachin? Do we have a member named that?
Yes. They mean Takaya, the one who just joined up recently.
And? Where is he?
Over there.
Hey! What're you doing?!
Huh? This is Takachinko? My mistake, dude... Dammit!
Don't mess with me!
How could you make a mistake?!
Well, everyone's hair looks like a baguette. I couldn't tell the difference.
Hey!
Four-eyes, are you Takaya's friend? I get it.
You came here to rehabilitate your buddy, eh?
I like that.
You want that small fry in your gang. Okay, take him.
But Chairman!
But, I want you to do something, first.
We have a ceremony one has to undergo before leaving the gang.
In his current condition, Takaya can't do it.
You guys are gonna do it for him.
The rules are simple.
You ride motorbikes to the edge of town... to the freeway that's under construction.
If you get there first, I'll let you take Takaya.
Anything goes. Using weapons, interfering with the opposing team, whatever.
If I was you, I'd have one of ya ride and the other one attack and obstruct.
All of you have to race. And we'll have four from our team.
Excuse me. We only have one scooter. Can you lend us one, creep?
Are you really a bike gang?!
Damn right, we are! We're eco-friendly rabble-rousers!
I guess we have no choice.
Huh? Sis, you can drive this thing?
A samurai does not concern himself with petty details, dude.
Gin-chan, I need to go to the little girl's room.
Then go take a leak over there someplace, dude.
What a thing to tell a lady!
Heh-heh, this is gonna be interesting.
Okay, get ready!
Ready...get...set... Go Bull...
...dogs!
The fools, here they come!
They have no idea this is a bloody ceremony to punish traitors!
You're all gonna die here!
Do it!
Flatten 'em!
Heizo!
Who's gonna die, Heizo-chan?
Gin-chan, I can't hold it anymore.
Go ahead and pee.
That's the power of our ultra moisturizer! Just lie there and grovel!
Why you--!
Wh-What?!
She used her teammate as a springboard!
Sis, what're you doing?! You probably just killed Gin-san! Hey!
I won't allow anybody to pass me!
I am the wind! Born free like the wind! Yahoo!
Huh?! Sis! Did you pass into another dimension or something?
It feels so good!
If we speed up by three kilometers, I think we could travel through time!
Sis! Time travel on your own time, okay?
First, the handle bars! Grab the handle bars!
You're not going to pass us!
I'll show you how frightening we Bulldogs are!
What're you doing?! I have three kilometers more to go! Don't interfere!
Hey, the handle bars! The handle bars!
Hey, no! Don't!
He's bald!
Sister, snap out of it! It wasn't real!
It's just a wig!
Whoa! What happened! All my hair got pulled out, and now it looks like I'm bald!
Why are you over explaining it like that?
Hey Matsutaro, is there anything you want?
Chairman, don't worry. Everyone's known about your hair condition for a long time.
Oh no! Seriously?
Shinpachi!
Just hang in there a little longer! Hang on!
What the hell is this brat?!
What's the big deal with rabble rousing biker gangs?!
I've been raising hell all my life!
Show 'em we're in a totally different class, Gin-chan!
Who is that?!
It's Gin-chan!
That's why I told him to switch the sake with strawberry milk!
Don't blame the sake! Your head's to blame!
You guys are better as comedians than a biker gang!
Oh yeah?
Looks like you're the comedian! What with your fly away wig and all!
Why you--!
Gin-san!
Was that girl just a decoy? You pulled my attention offa you...
I could send you straight to hell right now with my Special Samurai German Suplex.
But that would dampen Shinpachi's enthusiasm.
So from this point on, you'll race our captain fair and square!
Shinpachi! Go on and win this one for us.
Right!
Cripes!
What a pain in the ass!
What's the point of rescuing a useless idiot like you?
Poor guy, he could be dead by now.
Yup, there's never been anyone who lived through this ceremony.
Maybe they ran away.
That's possible. Maybe they groveled before the Chairman and begged for forgiveness.
They're late.
Maybe they really are dead.
Say something!
They're your friends, after all.
No doubt they're all dead.
Right. Flies attract flies. A scumbag is bound to have scumbag friends!
Hey, look.
What?
No way!
Don't tell me he made it through all the traps!
What about the bike?! He ran the whole way?!
Never mind the bike! The Chairman doesn't have his wig!
Takachin... I'm just like you, Takachin.
I hated my own weakness... and I always wanted to be strong...
That's why...
You fool...
Damn, thanks for nothing.
Do you know how hard it was for me to join that gang?
So you tried to make amends. Well, it's too late.
All right, I get it.
Listen, I'm not forgiving you, ever!
So don't pull anything like that again.
Takachin...
Back there... the chairman said he was impressed with your spirit.
He was gonna make you join the gang! Turning him down was a hassle.
I had to explain that I couldn't let my friend get mixed up in something like that.
Okay, okay. I hear you.
I've got to stop asking those jerks for help.
[Preview]
What's this?
Otsu-chan! Popular idol singer turned fighter!
When a person says something like that, it's a warning sign.
My favorite ramen shop once said, "Why don't we try serving curry?"
After that, the shop had to close.
The next episode: "Some Things Can't Be Cut with a Sword."
[Antonio Kagura breaks in to the "Amazons Tournament"!]
[Gintoki and Shinpachi try to leave acting like they don't know anything. But they meet someone unexpected.]
Just bring it from anywhere, jock itch!
Okay, next show is by those two guys, King Kong. Thank you.